Christmas Carols FullMetal Style!
by Lillian Kayl
Summary: Ed and the gang are here for you! singing Xmas carols! my first fic. I OWN ONLY Dagger and LilithLi. The songs were rewritten by me and my friend! Mild lanuage hints at funny couples
1. Chapter 1

X-mas Carols FullMetal style!

On the first day of Christmas

My true love gave to me:

A pipsqueak in a pear tree

Ed: HEY!

On the second day of Christmas

My true love gave to me:

2 silver watches

Winry: (spazzing) Can I take it apart!

Ed: No.

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree

Ed: Why am I up here again?

On the third day of Christmas

My true love gave to me:

3 flying wrenches

Ed: Ow!

Winry: You shouldn't have broken your Automail!

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree

Ed: Why I otta…!

On the fourth day of Christmas

My true love gave to me:

4 jugs of milk

Al: Brother, drink your milk

Ed: I DON'T WANNA!

3 flying wrenches

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree

Ed: NOT A PIPSQUEAK!

On the Fifth day of Christmas

My true love gave to me:

5 Philosopher's Stones!

Ed: Finally! Mine!

Envy: (tackles) Ours!

4 jugs of milk

3 flying wrenches

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree

Ed: Dammit, I'm not short…

On the sixth day of Christmas

My true love gave to me

6 ripped shirts

Armstrong: Yes! This is a technique passed down the Armstrong line for gen—

Dagger: Enough! (Smacks)

5 Philosopher's Stones!

4 jugs of milk

3 flying wrenches

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree

Ed: This isn't fair!

On the seventh day of Christmas

My true love gave to me:

7 Homunculi

Ed: Seven! I'd only want one, if any!

Envy: Well, I can be whoever you want. So who would you like, Mister Full Metal—

Ed: Don't say it!

6 ripped shirts

5 Philosopher's Stones!

4 jugs of milk

3 flying wrenches

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree

Ed: For the last time: SOMEONE GET ME DOWN!

On eighth day of Christmas

My true love gave to me:

8 Igniter gloves

Roy: (snaps) look fire!

Dagger: (entranced)

Lilith: Oooh…can I touch it?

7 homunculi

6 ripped shirts

5 philosopher's stones!

4 jugs of milk

3 flying wrenches

2 sliver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree

Ed: You'll help me Armstrong right?

Armstrong: of course I will Edward.

All: No!

On the ninth day of x-mas

My true love gave to me:

9 dog chimeras

Ed: You used your own daughter!

Tucker: Yes.

Ed: You bastard!

8 igniter gloves

7 homunculi

6 ripped shirts

5 philosopher's stones!

4 jugs of milk

3 fly wrenches

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree!

Ed: Roy this was your idea!

On the tenth day of x-mas

My true love gave to me:

10 annoying phone calls

Riza: babies aren't born after 5 months!

Hughes: She actually thought we were serious?

Riza: (sighs)

9 dog chimeras

8 igniter gloves

7 homunculi

6 ripped shirts

5 philosopher's stones

4 jugs of milk

3 flying wrenches

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree!

Ed: (groans) AlPHONSE!

On the eleventh day of x-mas

My true love gave to me:

11 pictures of Elisa

Hughes: isn't she cute? (shoves picture in Ed and Li's face)

Ed: sure she is…. mumbles

Li: get that picture out of my face!

10 annoying phone calls

9 dog chimeras

8 igniter gloves

7 homunculi

6 ripped shirts

5 philosopher's stones!

4 jugs of milk

3 flying wrenches

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree!

Ed: one more verse! (Evil laughter) ONE MORE VERSE!

On the twelfth day of x-mas

My true love gave to me:

12 transmutations

Roy: interesting, no circle.

Ed: HEY AL! LOOK!

11 pictures of Elisa

10 annoying phone calls

9 dog chimeras

8 igniter gloves

7 homunculi

6 ripped shirts

5 philosopher's stones

4 jugs of milk

3 flying wrenches

2 silver watches

And a pipsqueak in a pear tree!

Ed: The song is over! Finally! YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSS! The humiliation is over! In your face Mustang!

All but Ed: (leave)

Ed: wait a minute get me down! sings on the first day of x-mas my true love gave to me….GET ME DOWN!

Envy: runs in I'll help you down.

Ed: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

LOL what did u think?

Please read and review.

BTW, I'm Li and my friend is Dagger.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hughes:** I saw Flame kissing FullMetal  
On the couch in his office last night.  
He didn't see me creep  
through the halls to take a peep  
he thought that everyone was tucked up  
in their homes fast asleep.

Then, I saw Flame tickle FullMetal  
underneath his shirt so very tight

Oh, what trouble it would have been  
If Riza had only seen  
Flame kissing FullMetal last night.

0000000000000

**_Ed: WTF!_**

**_Roy: (laughs) come, come FullMetal it's not that bad_**

**_Riza: Of course it isn't is it? (points gun to Roy's head)_**

**_Roy: Damn you Hughes!_**

**_Hughes: (snickers)_**


	3. Chapter 3

THIS IS A PARODY OF HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LITTLE CHRISTMAS!

**_Envy:_** Do you have a sexy little Envy?  
You really should.  
From then on,  
your whole will be very good.

Do you have a cute little Gluttony?  
One that's fat and strange?  
If you do:  
you really should exchange

Long green hair and purple eyes,  
I am hotter than other guys  
I have a cool tattoo.

And I have a really  
cute palm tree.  
You must see it with me.  
Come along I'll take you there right now:

And have yourself a sexy little Envy now.

------------------------

pLEASE READ AND REVEIW! I HOPED YOU LIKED IT! i WILL TAKE REQUESTS!


	4. Chapter 4

Mustang got run over by a reindeer

Walking home from Central Christmas Eve.

You can say there's no such thing as Santa,

But as for me and Alphonse, we believe.

He'd been drinkin' too much egg nog,

And we'd begged him not to go.

But he'd forgot his igniter gloves

So he stumbled out the door into the snow.

When they found him Christmas mornin',

At the scene of the attack.

There were hoof prints on his igniter gloves

And incriminatin' Claus marks on his back.

Mustang got run over by a reindeer

Walking home from Central Christmas Eve.

You can say there's no such thing as Santa,

But as for me and Alphonse, we believe.

Now were all so proud of Riza

She's been takin' this so well.

See her in there shooting her gun

Doing paper work in this little Hell

It's not Christmas without Mustang

All the Alchemists are dressed in black.

And we just can't help but wonder:

Should take his furniture or send it back?

Mustang got run over by a reindeer

Walking home from Central Christmas Eve.

You can say there's no such thing as Santa,

But as for me and Alphonse, we believe.

Now the Alchemists are going to dinner

To eat and laugh and drink

While Riza stays in Roy's office

Washing off his gloves in the sink

I've warned all the Homunculi

They should watch out for themselves

They should never give a license,

To a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves.

Mustang got run over by a reindeer,

Walkin' home from Central, Christmas Eve.

You can say there's no such thing as Santa,

But as for me and Alphonse we believe


	5. Chapter 5

X-mas Carols FullMetal Style!

I own nothing

DO YOU HEAR WHAT I HEAR?

Said the Colonel to his men

Do you hear what I hear?

That man on the phone.

Do you hear what I hear?

It's Hughes, It's Hughes

Tying up the line

Someone get him off the phone

Someone get him off the phone.

Said Hughes to his wife

Do you see what I see?

In this picture my dear wife,

Do you see what I see?

Our daughter is so very cute

Could you send more pictures of her

Could you send more pictures of her?

Said the Colonel to the crowd

Do you know what I know?

About Fullmetal?

Do you know what I know?

He's lost, he's lost somewhere in this crowd.

I guess he's way too short

I guess he's way too short

Said Edward to the people everywhere

Listen to what I say

Or I shall explode

Listen to what I say.

I'm not that short so don't say that word!

Or Al will beat you up!

_**AL: WHAT?**_

Ed: or he shall beat you up!


End file.
